Want to be happy? Invest in experiences, not things
How can we maximize our happiness this summer? As Leaf Van Boven and Thomas Gilovich have demonstrated in numerous studies, including “To Do or to Have? That Is the Question” (pdf available here), experiences provide people with more happiness than things.
“The things we own deteriorate over time, and we habituate to them quickly,” Van Boven told me last year. Later, we’re not left with the initial rush we get from driving out of the lot of the BMW dealership, but with the reality of its poor mileage, obsessing over its care, getting the transmission replaced, and worrying about it getting stolen. Memories from the end, thanks to a cognitive quirk known as recency effect, are especially prone to standing out.
What makes experiences so much better–or why should you go on vacation instead of getting a new car? For one, memories of static events “age like fine wine,” and are later open to positive reinterpretation.
Large events like trips can change lives; moments are a meaningful part of our identity. We tend to reminisce about our trips in Tahiti, not expensive watches.
Most importantly, experiences contribute to relationships, and quality of our relationships is the number one predictor of happiness. Goods we buy can isolate us. Having a car means you never get to meet anyone on the bus; having your own exercise bike means you never meet anyone at the gym or the park. Special memories are made of moments. A flat screen TV in itself is no good; inviting friends over and having a party for the game is what makes it great. You don’t bond over clothes, you bond over browsing for clothes with a friend, or going to someone’s house to borrow something.
It’s true that there’s gray area; some goods, like a bicycle, you get to have experiences. If the goal is to ride your bike rather than show it off, any bike will do. In the example above, a cheap fishing pole would do just as nicely. The key is getting to the lake in the first place.
